Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Weapon of Mass Destruction

I don't often watch Phineas and Ferb, but my children like it. Even Cora, who asks for "Pinnis Pehrb." (Pronounce it like Ferb, but without the clear 'r' sound. Hard to type.) When I do watch--or overhear--it, I like it. I like that it's clean, there are no questionable scenes, no teenage themes, no scary monsters, buxom lycra-clad heroines or bad guys. Well, except for this guy:

But honestly, I love him. Professor Doofenshmirz and Perry the Platypus are the best part of the show! Without them, it would be really lame. I love that every single episode he comes up with some sort of invention that does something terrible, and always ends in '-inator.'
--Metal Destructinator (turns metal into broccoli)
--Evil Perry the Platypusinator (creates evil clones of Perry the Platypus)
--Nannyinator (creates an army of babies because who's going to counterattack a bunch of babies?)

So funny!

Oddly, all this -inator talk reminds me of something that you wouldn't usually associate with destruction:
Yes, my own personal Destructinator. (Note the zero pieces of tomorrow's lunch that have NOT been nibbled.)

It began rather innocently, with her climbing out of her crib, unlocking the door, opening it and coming downstairs when she was supposed to be napping. We added those white childproofing door knob covers and they helped for a bit. I was very surprised at her solution:

I only wish I was kidding.

Soon her barely-2yo 'skills' progressed to removing the twisty tie from the hamster cage (even after I threw in a couple of half knots with all the twists) and after a while we had to lock the parakeet in her cage. Like with a padlock. And a key kept way up high. I really wish I was kidding.

She looks angelic, doesn't she? Just missing a halo. Right. Let me remind you of this fun encounter.

Don't even THINK of leaving an avocado on the counter to ripen.

When we moved into our bachelor friend's house, the fun really started. My favorite, of course, was hearing Alex outside yell, "Cora, No! Moooommm! Cora's on the roof!" Yeah. Nice. Did not take the time to grab my camera for that. (Did take an awful shot with my phone 'cause I'm an awesome mom like that.)

Other fun things were having her experiment with a b.r.a.n.d. n.e.w. tube of toothpaste

and bring the landlord's "toda" into the bathroom so she could have a drink.

(My all-time favorite.)

So I'm thinking that I either need to have Homeland Security keep an eye on her or borrow her. 'Cause she could do something crazy to some bad guy somewhere.

Professor Doofenshmirtz, you have met your match.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Coming out of the Closet

I haven't been really consistent about my blog posts lately, and there are a few reasons:
--no internet
--looking for housing in a different city
--having such a bad attitude that I'd better just keep my trap shut so nothing horrid comes out
--taking lots of pictures, but losing my camera usb cable

They're all decent reasons, but in reality it all boils down to this one:

Yup. Surprise! (For the 2 followers I have who aren't family or friends I've seen lately.)

This pic was taken the last weekend of July. The girl on the left is my very own chicklegirl, who was sweet enough to swing over on her 'day off' because my Riah & his siblings were participating in a sprint triathlon close enough for her to visit. I sure love her!

So for all of you who are wondering, "Why on earth didn't I know? Or did I know but just forgot?" the answer is, "because Dyann is a little odd."

A couple of years ago I got a weird hair and mentioned to the Hubby, "I think the next time I get pregnant I don't want to tell anyone. I'll just let them figure it out."

I know. Who does that? Who keeps a pregnancy secret from everyone in the world except the hubby & the landlord? Well, I guess I do. This time. Hubby's mom found out when we moved to her neighborhood in June, and his siblings, dad & stepmom found out the end of July...when I was about 5 months along.

The ladies at church were asking around 2.5 months. Geez! That's what comes from having zero torso, I guess. My favorite conversation came from a woman my mother's age who watched me grow with Lee & Cora. She put her arm around me and said something lovingly prying. I responded that we're not announcing it yet. Her honest, fabulous answer was, "Honey, you did tonight." BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I love her.

Details: currently about 29 weeks along (6.5 months or so), due November 23rd. My ovaries, however, have not read the book about fertility and timing and such, so I'm calling it 'just before Thanksgiving.' Getting very large, but do not know for certain the gender. Want a girl, think it's a boy, will be happy with whatever we get.

So while the reasons above are perfectly valid, the main underlying one is the fatigue & nausea (1st trimester), low energy (2nd trimester) and reduced mobility (3rd trimester) that comes from growing another super cute Monkey.

I'm really looking forward to kissing that round little noggin.